You've got to wake up and ignite your internal motivational meter in order to make lasting change! This internal motivational meter, in psychological terms, is referred to as your “intrinsic" motivation. These motivators are based on your personal needs and values that are driving your desire for change.
To make change, first observe and evaluate the situation honestly! What is the need I am are trying to meet by making this change? List out each need you are aiming to meet and how this new habit/activity will support that need. You may even want to list how you have been neglecting this need and how that has had an impact on your life. Simultaneously, identify the different values attached to this goal. Values often arise out of questioning “Why is this important to me”? Maybe it is important to you because you value family (living a healthy life so you can be around a long time for your children), or you value health (being healthy makes me feel strong and good, etc).
Some other Questions to Ask Yourself: How would you like to show up for yourself now? What needs am I tired of neglecting? What needs have to be met for my wellbeing and happiness to arise? What values do I honor by carrying out this new goal? How can I step more deeply into my authentic self? What obstacles am I willing to overcome with this new journey of change?
You may want to seek out a coach, such as myself to support you on this journey ;-). Investing in yourself and hiring an intuitive spiritual coach to hold you accountable will make the journey more clear, supportive and achievable. Much of the coaching experience involves me asking you those questions above and you will actually need to answer them and move forward on them. Did you know it's been researched that over 90% of people who attend seminars on personal growth may feel enlightened by the experience but take absolutely NO ACTION after the seminar to follow through with those "aha" moments?!
If you are not ready to hire a coach, let me guide you to this great resource in the meantime: “One Small Step Can Change Your Life, The Kaizen Way” by Robert Maurer PhD (2014). This is a quick and practical read that is based on the simple principles of taking changes one step at a time. The two top tips I’ve taken away from this book of making changes is to:
1)” Take One Less Sip”. The Author, Dr. Maurer breaks down how we can simply take one less bite of that donut, take one less sip of alcohol, one less……I think you get the point! The idea is to start small so any of the overwhelm that often disables us in making changes, will become disarmed as the change is so small that it no longer poses a threat to the letting go process that happens with the old habit.
2) “Incorporate more of what you need”. When we make more time for what we need, there will naturally be less space for those old habits that do not serve us well to show up and take over. The idea is to focus less on cutting things out or stopping or eliminating things. Instead, simply focus on creating time to incorporate more of what will serve you well. Your old habits will naturally shrink slowly but surely as there will be less time for those habits and you will notice the difference of how much better you feel from simply adding in a workout each week, putting veggies on your plates or taking those deep breathes throughout your day.
Above all else, when faced with the inevitable reality of CHANGE happening around us and inside of us, take some time to observe how well you receive and adapt to change. The practice of “going with the flow” has infinite benefits and “going with the flow” does not necessarily mean you agree with the change, it simply allows you to flowingly adapt and move more strategically with your next steps.
Liz Myers, M.A., RYT-200
Spiritual Life Coach
One Small Step Can Change Your Life: The Kaizen Way by Robert Maurer Ph.D. 2014
Liz Myers, MA, RYT200
Spiritual Life Coach, Yoga and Meditation Teacher.
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